Reflections on life at “De Witte Wand”…

  • Damn It, Janet

    Another event in London that I missed. I saw the original production at the Royal Court (was it really 33 years ago? Ohmigod!), have seen the film countless times and have even gone to parties dressed as Frank-N-Furter. It’s in my blood, I tell you…

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  • Choose One from the Following

    Gary McKinnon is either:
     
    a) barking
     
    b) a sad case
     
    c) trying to justify himself
     
    d) taking us for a ride
     
    My money hovers between (b) and (d), but (a) would not surprise me.

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  • The Sultan’s Elephant

    Now that’s something I would like to have seen…
     

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  • I Am Not A Number…

    One response to “I Am Not A Number…”

    1. evencastles Avatar
      evencastles

      Greetings from Shanghai.

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  • Doctor Who’s Viral Marketing

    The BBC has been setting up tie-in websites as viral marketing for Doctor Who. I haven’t had time to explore them yet, but will try to do so sometime soon.
     
    And may I just say that the reinvented Doctor Who series has been simply wonderful. Christopher Eccleston was excellent, and David Tennant is already shaping up to match him in the eponymous role. It’s not simply that the production values of the new series are an order of magnitude better than the cardboard sets and characters of the original (fun, in a cheesy sort of way, though they were). It’s that the quality of the writing, and the strength of the acting of all the lead characters, knocks the series into a different class altogether. For example the scene in the swimming pool between David Tennant and Anthony Head in last week’s School Reunion was electrifying, and the dissection of the doctor’s character by his present and past assistants (Billie Piper and Elisabeth Sladen) was brilliant. In fact, the tying together of past and present in School Reunion made that episode for me one of the most satisfying I have ever seen, while The Doctor Dances remains as my number one favourite, with Boom Town as a close second, because of the scenes between Annette Badland and Christopher Eccleston.. 
     
    My only regret is that Martin does not share my enthusiasm for Doctor Who in any shape or form, so I’ve got no-one to discuss it face to face with. Perhaps I’ll just talk to the dog about it. At least he won’t get bored and go off to do something else.
     
    (hat-tip to Diamond Geezer of the tie-in websites link)

    4 responses to “Doctor Who’s Viral Marketing”

    1. robert Avatar
      robert

      Thanks for these links (noise of bookmarking) I just need to get around to watching the School Reunion – was out on Saturday, my attempt to tape it yesterday failed, have to wait until Friday!Not sure what’s happened to the formatting of your blog but starting with the first few lines of the film meme and upwards – in firefox at any rate – the lines are too long and overlap the right hand column – maybe it’s caused by the middle Kai photo which also sticks out rightwards..

    2. Geoff Avatar
      Geoff

      Robert, it may well be an artifact of how the various browsers handle HTML. In IE6 and IE7, the formatting is OK – although as you say, the middle Kai photo gets cut off by the right margin of the central blog column. However, that’s always been the case with photos of this size that I use in the blog, and nothing new. Try reading just the blog (the blog items then take up the entire page) and see if that helps.

    3. Gelert Avatar
      Gelert

      Can’t stand Ecclestone!! And now they are going to do the unthinkable and re-make ‘The Prisoner’ (as if!) AND they’re giving the Patrick Mc Whatsit part to Ecclestone!!!!

    4. Geoff Avatar
      Geoff

      Gelert, we will just have to agree to disagree. I think Eccleston is a fine actor. His Doctor Who grew in depth as the series progressed, and his acting in "Second Coming" was simply outstanding…

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  • Anthony Bourdain

    Attention, Mike, over at Coffee Corner; there’s a great interview with Anthony Bourdain in today’s Observer that I think you’l enjoy.
     
    And for the rest of you, if you haven’t yet read Kitchen Confidential, you don’t know what you’re missing.

    4 responses to “Anthony Bourdain”

    1. Brian Avatar
      Brian

      I loved Kitchen Confidential, but shamefully have not yet thrown out my garlic press.  Is there an internet link to the Observer interview?  I only get the Sunday Times, and barely have time to read that!

    2. Brian Avatar
      Brian

      Ooops, yes, found it, thanks.  hehe.  a-hem.

    3. Geoff Avatar
      Geoff

      Ahem – I have also not yet thrown out my garlic press. Clearly we are both destined for some version of hell akin to the kitchen described in Gormenghast…

    4. Michael Avatar
      Michael

      Gah, I’m out of date in my blog reading.  Blame it on the job.  Thanks for the tip – that was a great interview.  I do still have my garlic peeler, quietly serving as ballast in the gadget drawer.Gormenghast.  God, I couldn’t slog through that even though I wanted to.  I did read the kitchen parts, and know the hell you describe, but man.  Very, very dense.  I ought to give it a second chance someday.

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  • Koninginnedag Comes Early This Year

    On the 30th April every year, the Dutch celebrate the late Queen Juliana’s birthday. This is Queen’s day (Koninginnedag). It’s really an excuse for a big party that will happen throughout the Netherlands. Because the 30th April falls on a Sunday this year, the celebrations are being brought forward to the 29th.
     
    Tomorrow, weather permitting, we’ll be cycling around part of a 44 kilometre circuit that takes in a series of art exhibitions in the locality. Then on Sunday we’ll be joining our new neighbours for the local Koninginnedag party, which, to confuse everyone, is actually being held on the 30th instead of the 29th. I’m sure it made sense to someone…   

    One response to “Koninginnedag Comes Early This Year”

    1. kelly Avatar
      kelly

      HELLO OLD CHAPPY, ALTHOUGH NOT AS OLD AS I.
      57
      67
      77
      87
      98…O NO THE PATTERN MESSED UP. I AM 97.
      GOOD HOUSE.
      DO YOU LIKE GERKINS?
      I DO I DO I DO I DOO

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  • China Dispatches

    Brian Sack (Banterist) is visiting China at the moment. His impressions of the country and its culture are being captured in a series of dispatches. Well worth reading – particularly the guidance for using the squat toilet. Brings back memories to me of a trip through some of France’s camping sites about 20 years ago…

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  • A Brisk Lesson

    What with all the work involved in the move to the country, we’ve missed several weeks of The Apprentice. However, we were able to catch up with last night’s episode – a real humdinger involving Syed and Ruth fighting tooth and nail with each other. And they were on the same team.  Nancy Bank-Smith’s review of the episode in today’s Guardian is worth reading. Watching Sir Alan deal with them was, as Bank-Smith says, a brisk lesson in elementary butchery. Lovely stuff.

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  • An Addition to the Family

    As I’ve mentioned before, Martin had his heart set on owning a dog once more once we moved to the country. The original plan was to sign up for a puppy. However, a breeder contacted us saying that she had had a three-year old Labrador returned to her, because the owners were no longer able to keep it, and were we interested?
     
    Naturally, Martin was excited, and so we went to view the dog. Signs were good, and thus we became the owners of the dog last week. So far, despite my rationalism, I find myself reluctantly becoming fond of the beast. Martin is, of course, besotted. The dog is, of course, just a dog. But when it gazes up at you with those big brown eyes… then there’s obviously some deep genetic thing going on between humans and dogs about which I am powerless to protest.
     
    Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Kai van de Beckenkamp; offspring of Just Brown van ‘t Meijelicht (father) and Fresh Fields Makaya (mother)…
     

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    One response to “An Addition to the Family”

    1. […] Kai came into our lives shortly after we moved to the farmhouse, 11 years ago. He was then three years old. His first owners had moved from a house into a flat, and it was clear to them that Kai was not happy with the downsizing, so with heavy hearts they asked the breeder to try and find new owners for him. We were the lucky ones. […]

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  • The Film Meme

    OK, a quick digression into meme-land. This list should probably – for reasons of alliteration – be called the "Movie Meme", however, if you don’t mind I prefer sticking to "Film". The word "Movie" has an air of cheap cigar about it as far as I’m concerned.
     
    Anyway, here’s a list of 102 films that people who are supposed to be literate about film really ought to have seen. My score is in bold. How did you do?
     
    2001: A Space Odyssey” (1968) Stanley Kubrick
    “The 400 Blows” (1959) Francois Truffaut
    8 1/2" (1963) Federico Fellini
    “Aguirre, the Wrath of God” (1972) Werner Herzog
    Alien” (1979) Ridley Scott
    All About Eve” (1950) Joseph L. Mankiewicz
    Annie Hall” (1977) Woody Allen
    Apocalypse Now” (1979) Francis Ford Coppola*
    Bambi” (1942) Disney
    The Battleship Potemkin” (1925) Sergei Eisenstein
    “The Best Years of Our Lives” (1946) William Wyler
    “The Big Red One” (1980) Samuel Fuller
    The Bicycle Thief” (1949) Vittorio De Sica
    “The Big Sleep” (1946) Howard Hawks
    Blade Runner” (1982) Ridley Scott
    Blowup” (1966) Michelangelo Antonioni
    Blue Velvet” (1986) David Lynch
    Bonnie and Clyde” (1967) Arthur Penn
    “Breathless” (1959 Jean-Luc Godard
    Bringing Up Baby” (1938) Howard Hawks
    Carrie” (1975) Brian DePalma
    Casablanca” (1942) Michael Curtiz
    Un Chien Andalou” (1928) Luis Bunuel & Salvador Dali
    “Children of Paradise” / “Les Enfants du Paradis” (1945) Marcel Carne
    Chinatown” (1974) Roman Polanski
    Citizen Kane” (1941) Orson Welles
    A Clockwork Orange” (1971) Stanley Kubrick
    The Crying Game” (1992) Neil Jordan
    The Day the Earth Stood Still” (1951) Robert Wise
    Days of Heaven” (1978) Terence Malick
    “Dirty Harry” (1971) Don Siegel
    The Discreet Charm of the Bourgeoisie” (1972) Luis Bunuel
    “Do the Right Thing” (1989 Spike Lee
    La Dolce Vita” (1960) Federico Fellini
    Double Indemnity” (1944) Billy Wilder
    Dr. Strangelove” (1964) Stanley Kubrick
    Duck Soup” (1933) Leo McCarey
    E.T. — The Extra-Terrestrial” (1982) Steven Spielberg
    Easy Rider” (1969) Dennis Hopper
    The Empire Strikes Back” (1980) Irvin Kershner
    The Exorcist” (1973) William Friedkin
    Fargo” (1995) Joel & Ethan Coen
    Fight Club” (1999) David Fincher
    Frankenstein” (1931) James Whale
    “The General” (1927) Buster Keaton & Clyde Bruckman
    The Godfather,” “The Godfather, Part II” (1972, 1974) Francis Ford Coppola
    Gone With the Wind” (1939) Victor Fleming
    GoodFellas” (1990) Martin Scorsese
    The Graduate” (1967) Mike Nichols
    “Halloween” (1978) John Carpenter
    A Hard Day’s Night” (1964) Richard Lester
    “Intolerance” (1916) D.W. Griffith
    “It’s a Gift” (1934) Norman Z. McLeod
    It’s a Wonderful Life” (1946) Frank Capra
    Jaws” (1975) Steven Spielberg
    “The Lady Eve” (1941) Preston Sturges
    Lawrence of Arabia” (1962) David Lean
    “M” (1931) Fritz Lang
    Mad Max 2" / “The Road Warrior” (1981) George Miller
    “The Maltese Falcon” (1941) John Huston
    “The Manchurian Candidate” (1962) John Frankenheimer
    Metropolis” (1926) Fritz Lang
    Modern Times” (1936) Charles Chaplin
    Monty Python and the Holy Grail” (1975) Terry Jones & Terry Gilliam
    Nashville” (1975) Robert Altman
    The Night of the Hunter” (1955) Charles Laughton
    “Night of the Living Dead” (1968) George Romero
    North by Northwest” (1959) Alfred Hitchcock
    “Nosferatu” (1922) F.W. Murnau
    On the Waterfront” (1954) Elia Kazan
    “Once Upon a Time in the West” (1968) Sergio Leone
    “Out of the Past” (1947) Jacques Tournier
    “Persona” (1966) Ingmar Bergman
    Pink Flamingos” (1972) John Waters
    Psycho” (1960) Alfred Hitchcock
    “Pulp Fiction” (1994) Quentin Tarantino
    Rashomon” (1950) Akira Kurosawa
    Rear Window” (1954) Alfred Hitchcock
    “Rebel Without a Cause” (1955) Nicholas Ray
    “Red River” (1948) Howard Hawks
    Repulsion” (1965) Roman Polanski
    “The Rules of the Game” (1939) Jean Renoir
    “Scarface” (1932) Howard Hawks
    “The Scarlet Empress” (1934) Josef von Sternberg
    Schindler’s List” (1993) Steven Spielberg
    “The Searchers” (1956) John Ford
    The Seven Samurai” (1954) Akira Kurosawa
    Singin’ in the Rain” (1952) Stanley Donen & Gene Kelly
    Some Like It Hot” (1959) Billy Wilder
    A Star Is Born” (1954) George Cukor
    A Streetcar Named Desire” (1951) Elia Kazan
    Sunset Boulevard” (1950) Billy Wilder
    “Taxi Driver” (1976) Martin Scorsese
    The Third Man” (1949) Carol Reed
    “Tokyo Story” (1953) Yasujiro Ozu
    Touch of Evil” (1958) Orson Welles
    “The Treasure of the Sierra Madre” (1948) John Huston
    “Trouble in Paradise” (1932) Ernst Lubitsch
    Vertigo” (1958) Alfred Hitchcock
    West Side Story” (1961) Jerome Robbins/Robert Wise
    “The Wild Bunch” (1969) Sam Peckinpah
    The Wizard of Oz” (1939) Victor Fleming

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  • The Garden in Spring

    We’re starting to tackle the garden at the farmhouse with the arrival of some warmer weather. There’s quite a lot of the garden to tackle, so it will be occupying much of our time, I feel. At the back of the property is a one acre meadow that should be mowed at least once a week apparently. Even though we have the luxury of a sit-upon mower, this takes a few hours each time to complete.
     

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  • Reconnecting the Firehose

    I’m here crossing my fingers because tomorrow, with a bit of luck, someone will arrive to install ADSL at the farmhouse. This last month without Broadband access has felt really strange. I’ve hardly been surfing at all on the Internet and the blog has slowed almost to a standstill.
     
    Mind you, I think it will also be a problem to find the time to surf. These last four weeks we have been falling into bed every night totally exhausted from all the jobs that need doing around the house and the land. Today, for example, I mowed the meadow – which took 3 hours even though I was regally seated on my mowing machine dispensing royal waves to passing cyclists.
     
    Add to that we now have a dog – a 3-year-old chocolate brown Labrador – who needs lots of attention every day. Quiet life in the country? You have got to be joking! I think it was quieter when I was working for my living. Still, this life is giving more satisfaction.
     
    Hopefully, more updates to follow once ADSL is installed…

    One response to “Reconnecting the Firehose”

    1. […] also a bit strange to think that, back then, I thought of ADSL as “drinking from the firehose” – I suppose it was, considering it was 60 times faster than dial-up access. However, as the […]

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  • Sharing the House

    We’ve had a wooden floor put in the bedroom at the farmhouse. While that’s been going on, we’ve spent the last couple of nights sleeping in a room in the outhouse. A bit basic, but doable – and the plan is to turn that room into a guest bedroom anyway. The room has a small attic above it, which is accessible from the workroom next door.
     
    The first night we were vaguely aware of the patter of tiny feet, but last night the patter appeared to turn into a full scale barn dance. And either the mice were wearing hobnailed boots, or we may have a larger species of rodent to deal with. This will explain the selection of traps that the previous owners left in the workroom. I shall get some practice in. Oh, and a cat.

    2 responses to “Sharing the House”

    1. Gelert Avatar
      Gelert

      reminds me of when I was a kid. We had wooden floors in part of the house, and if you lay on the floor with your ear to the boards and scratched, little feet would scratch back at you!! I thought it was borrowers until someone explained.

    2. Geoff Avatar
      Geoff

      I checked the traps this morning – two tiny corpses. I can’t believe that mice can make so much noise.

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  • Between a Rock and a Hard Place

    "There’s nothing we can do – it’s an automated system"
     
    That’s a sentence that is guaranteed to raise my blood pressure. Having worked in IT myself, I know that it’s not the computer’s fault; the blame can be laid entirely at the door of the humans who designed, programmed and paid for the computer system.
     
    The latest example that has been sent to try me is provided courtesy of my Internet Service Provider, XS4ALL.
     
    Normally, when one moves house in the Netherlands, the telecom provider (KPN) and the Internet Service Provider work in tandem to ensure that the ADSL (Broadband) service is also moved at the same time. Alas, my experience has been been far from troublefree and seamless. My experience has resulted in an XS4ALL sales support person uttering that dreaded sentence at the beginning of this piece.
     
    The seed of my misfortune lies in the fact that I used an ISDN line at my old address to carry the ADSL service, while here at the farmhouse we have a plain old Analogue line. KPN and XS4ALL are quite happy to move ADSL between two ISDN lines, or between two Analogue lines; but between and ISDN and an Analogue line? Unfortunately, "that does not compute", as I’ve found out to my cost. At first, I was told that it could be done, but then it was: "sorry, you’ll have to cancel the ADSL service on the ISDN line and then reapply for a new ADSL service on the Analogue line". This I did – and then found out that I couldn’t apply for the new ADSL service until the old service is stopped. This takes a month. Then, once the application for the new service is made, it takes a further two or three weeks before the new service is available. Going back to dialup speeds after ADSL is like watching paint dry on most modern web sites. Still, I resigned myself to being up to three weeks without my ADSL fix.
     
    But now, a new wrinkle in this sorry saga has appeared. KPN have indeed stopped my old ADSL service, but XS4ALL are still insisting that I have it, and are still stopping me from applying for a new one.
     
    According to KPN’s automated system, KPN stopped the old ADSL on the 31st March. Not bad, I suppose, considering that they were supposed to have stopped it on the 27th March, as had been agreed. Considering that they had a month’s notice, they really should have been able to hit the 27th March target…
     
    Meanwhile, XS4ALL’s automated system is still stubbornly insisting that I am enjoying ADSL service on an ISDN line that is itself no longer operational (I also cancelled the ISDN line). Last week, an XS4ALL’s sales support person first claimed that this was a temporary abberation, and that all would be well on Monday 3rd April. Inevitably, Monday has come and gone with no change. A second sales support person claimed on Tuesday the 4th April that it would all be alright by the end of this week. It was she who could quite clearly see in her information system that something was wrong, but then cheerfully uttered the Dutch equivalent of "There’s nothing we can do – it’s an automated system". 
     
    So the upshot is that muggins here has found himself trapped in a hell between two automated systems that appear to refuse to communicate with each other, with support staff who seem to be unable to do a damn thing about it. And until they do, I can’t order my new ADSL line. It looks as though I am condemmed to dialup for at least a month, if not longer. Meanwhile, XS4ALL’s marketing department’s ad campaign extolling the virtues of fast Internetting with ADSL rolls on. I am thinking uncharitable thoughts at the moment.

    8 responses to “Between a Rock and a Hard Place”

    1. Gelert Avatar
      Gelert

      Heck Geoff. My sympathy. There’s nothing more annoying than a problem you can’t do a damn thing about, that no one who could seems to give a flying f%£* about.  Have the same problem with my router, which keeps dropping internet connection, making it impossible to function online for about 3-4 hours a night. Is it the router? Is it my service provider? Neither seems to know or care, each insists its the other but can’t really help…… the other night I almost smashed the router against the wall, until I realised its as much a victim as I am!! heck, did I just say that? Its a bastard that seems to hate me. I really think I’m losing it!!

    2. Geoff Avatar
      Geoff

      We seem to be inching further forward. This morning, XS4ALL’s Service Centre application, which lists a users’ set of services, was no longer showing my old ADSL service in the list of my services. Nonetheless, the ADSL application web pages still won’t let me apply for the new one, because it claims I already have it. So it’s not just the KPN and XS4ALL systems that are slow to communicate with each other – it’s XS4ALL’s own internal systems as well. Sigh.

    3. Geoff Avatar
      Geoff

      I do NOT believe it!!! The XS4ALL system finally let me start asking for a new ADSL line -I get to the last page of a nine page questionnaire and then the bloody thing says "Server Error – please start again"! I swear, they’ve got it in for me…

    4. Geoff Avatar
      Geoff

      Well, finally, after I think the fifth time of trying today, the XS4ALL system has finally accepted my order for a new ADSL service. I trust that it will be installed by the end of the month – but on past performance, I’m not holding out too much hope.

    5. Unknown Avatar
      Unknown

      dearest geoff, i’m so sorry you’re having such a hard time with your hookups….hang in there, young man, sip something while watching your paint dry….n

    6. Brian Avatar
      Brian

      Brian sighs, Mozart twinkles in the background and candleight dances through a glass of pouilly fume.  Remember the old days?  When we used to write letters, ink to paper, sheets and sheets?  When the only thing we had to manipulate was the quill to the inkpot and more wine in the glass?  If we weren’t sure of the spelling of a word we’d rise, bridge the miles across the carpet of the study, reach up and pull down – a dictionary.  Google was something we did to the knickers on next door’s washing line and a service provider was those ladies Uncle Reg would occasionally visit that he thought Aunt Madge didn’t know about.  No ASDL, no SODs, NAFFOFs or YERWAs.  Eh, them were’t days, lad!

    7. Geoff Avatar
      Geoff

      Hah, Coboró – you’re right. It does no harm to slow down. I have now placed my ancient copy of the Concise Oxford Dictionary within easy reach. It’s faster than searching for words online.

    8. […] the first months of living here. We should have had ADSL internet access (3 mbit/s), but there was a mixup made by our service provider, and the ADSL service was not transferred from our previous house in Gouda to the […]

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  • How Animals Have Sex

    I have mentioned this book by Gideon Defoe before. But that was before I had read it. I am here to report that the reviews were completely on target. This is one of the funniest books I have read in recent years. As the blurb on the book cover says: from panda porn to snail love-darts, this is a guide to the reproductive habits of creatures great and small. It is a simply wonderful book.
     
    Message to Chris and Ed – this is definitely one for your collection. Well done Gideon!
     
    Look, just order it from Amazon, will you? I promise you, you won’t regret it.

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  • Country Living

    Well, it’s now a week since we took possession of the farmhouse. We arrived last Friday afternoon at 13:45 for an inspection of the property before trooping off to the notary for the signing of the contract. The previous owners were at the house, together with representatives of their estate agents and ours. Neither of the reps had seen the house before – the people who had been involved in the sale had now moved on. The new reps were duly impressed with the farmhouse. One pointed out that in the attic, where you can clearly see the roof construction, that the original roof timbers have been left as an internal skeleton when the roof was enlarged some 35 years ago.
     
    Then it was off to the notary, where the notary – who was in his twenties (I really feel old) – went through the formal proceedings. Everybody signed. Why is it that notaries have such flamboyant flourishes that they pass off as their signature whereas I have a miserable spider crawl? The previous owners presented us with a basket of local produce from a neighbouring farm and then sped off to their new home in Friesland.
     
    We returned to our new home to find that the entrance had been decorated with streamers and balloons in our absence by a welcoming committee of friends. One of them had also painted a welcome sign, and on the back of the sign hung a series of eight nesting boxes for various species of bird. That evening we were seven for dinner (provided by the mother of our painter friend) – and quantities of champagne and wine were consumed.
     
    The following morning we were expecting a visit from the plasterer and the carpenter so that we could discuss our redecoration plans. At 11am, they arrived, but so did their families, a dog, a large cake, coffee and beer. It was yet another excuse for a celebration, and Martin was kept busy with guided tours of the house and grounds – everyone was curious to see what we’d bought. Finally, we were presented with workmans’ clothes – a pair of workman’s jeans for Martin and a pair of overalls for me – together with Dutch farmer’s caps and scarves (mine were both in a fetching shade of pink). Toasts to our arrival were drunk in “Achterhoekse Champagne” (beer), and a good time was had by all.
     
    Sunday, we visited some of the neighbours to say hello and to present them with Stroopwaffels (a sort of biscuit that is a speciality of Gouda). That involved a 2km walk passing four farmhouses in the vicinity. All the neighbours seem most pleasant and welcoming to the strange birds that have descended upon them.
     
    This past week we’ve had a series of appointments with workmen to discuss what needs to be done. If we do this sort of thing in Gouda, it’s pure business. Here, we discover that they will expect to sit and chat with you about life in general. We’ve just had the attic space in the main house and the roof space of the outbuilding sprayed against woodworm and deathwatch beetle. It was a little worrying to see some of the ravaged timbers in the attic – in the course of nearly 200 years, deathwatch beetle has chewed away some sizable chunks. But then again, as the workman pointed out, the building is still standing, and there’s no evidence of recent activity.
     
    Today, we’ve had the plasterer working on the living room – bare brick walls in the living room may have been the fashion in the 1970s, but it’s not to our taste. We will leave some of the original beams exposed as a testament to the history of the house, but walls will be plastered, thank you very much.
     
    Next week we have the painters in and the main floor will be polished. We still have to get some wooden floors installed in some rooms, and I doubt whether we can do that before the removal men bring all our stuff from Gouda, so I expect that we will be living out of boxes for some time to come.
     
    This is a real change of pace of life for us both. It is amazing to wake up at night and listen to the stillness. Equally amazing is that I’m writing this while gazing out at the front garden with a neighbouring farm off in the distance. To my left I can see the local woods – a 10 minute walk. A pheasant has just run across the lawn, and I see that a pair of hedge sparrows have started nesting in the nesting box in the tree 10 metres away in front of the window. I must find suitable places for the rest of those boxes.

    2 responses to “Country Living”

    1. Brian Avatar
      Brian

      Sounds bliss!  I live in farmland on the outskirts of Brussels and occasionally get pheasants and owls in the garden.  A bit too close to the E40 for perfect stillness, but I love the sun in my small garden.  Sadly I must leave it soon.  Need a houseboy?  I cook and garden….(!)
       
      Anyhow, welcome home, Geoff.

    2. Geoff Avatar
      Geoff

      Hi, Coboró – thanks for your thought. We’re not in the market for a houseboy just yet – but that point may well come in 10 or 20 years! It will probably take a little while before we think of the farmhouse as ‘home’ – but I’m confident that we’ll reach that point before too long. Cheers.

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  • Jumped-up Walkmans

    Lucy Mangan, in today’s Guardian, has a most satisfying rant against iPods and their witless owners. She sums up my feelings precisely.

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  • The Dutch Citizenship Test

    Last January, I mentioned the test that would-be immigrants to the Netherlands would have to take. It went live last week. There’s an article on the Radio Netherlands web site describing the procedure. I certainly don’t share the journalist’s touching belief that the voice-recognition system used in the test (there are no human examiners involved) is "foolproof". Pull the other one – it’s got bells on it. It turns out that entrants will need to buy the exam materials, which contain all 100 questions and their authorised answers. Then in the exam, 30 questions, selected from the 100, will be given. My hunch is that the entrant will have to parrot back exactly the words and intonation used in the authorised answer to have any hope of passing the voice-recognition system. So the Dutch want parrots, not citizens…
     
    The procedure is described on the Ministry for Justice web site. While I see that EU citizens are exempt from having to take the test, I did notice in the fine print on this page the statement: "As newcomers these people will, however, usually be required to follow the integration programme once in the Netherlands".
     
    "Required", eh? That doesn’t sound like an exemption to me.

    2 responses to “The Dutch Citizenship Test”

    1. Gelert Avatar
      Gelert

      Heck, and what happens if you fail? Over here now, all you have to know is what a doner kebab is, and how much a helping of chips costs.

    2. Geoff Avatar
      Geoff

      Um, I don’t know what happens to someone who’s already here… If I were outside the EU and failed the test, I’d merely be eligible to pay another 350 euros for the privilege of taking the test again…

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  • The Sub-Editor’s Art

    Forget the actual article, just savour the brilliant headline that has been provided by an anonymous sub-editor to this review in today’s Observer.

    3 responses to “The Sub-Editor’s Art”

    1. robert Avatar
      robert

      Not sure that I believe the name of the journalist – or maybe thta’s what sparked the sub-editor’s imagination?

    2. Geoff Avatar
      Geoff

      While it could possibly be a nom-de-plume, our Kitty is a genuine reviewer on the staff of the Observer. But there’s clearly a sub-editor on the paper who loves excruciating puns – here’s another example from the same issue.
       
      The Guardian has a long history of punning sub-editors. I still remember, with pleasure, the effort of a sub-editor called John Hall who titled a scathing review of the 1963 film Cleopatra with "The Biggest Asp Disaster in the World". It may not resonate with young people nowadays, but to me, brought up on a diet of Gracie Fields in her later years, it certainly did (clue: look at the list of her song titles).

    3. robert Avatar
      robert

      Yes the one I remember is ‘many pythons fly in suitcase’ probably back in the early 70’s

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